When I was young I said I would never get married.
I said I would never have children.
I said I would never put myself in a dependent position.

I've been married, twice.
I have had a baby.
I am a dependent.

When I was pregnant I said I would not be one of those people who let their baby to "cry it out."

For over 6 months now I have been getting only 3-5 non-contiguous hours of sleep per night because I tend to my sweet baby boy who wakes up many, many, many, many, many, many, many times and cannot put himself back to sleep.

He now weighs 16 pounds. During his night wakings, while I am trying to nurse him back to sleep, he kicks, scratches, bangs his hands, and sometimes bites (with his new bottom teeth).

I can't take it anymore. I have tried many no-cry solutions and taken everyone's contradictory advice. Night before last, I realized he is only going to get bigger, more difficult to handle, and that drastic times call for drastic measures. So last night when he awakened after two and a half hours of sleep, I gave him dry pants and a full tummy, kissed him goodnight, put him down in his bed, walked away and closed the door (but for a crack). He cried for 59 minutes before putting himself to sleep.

Never say never.